A Survivor's Voice

In 1990, my abuser (Ward Hamilton-Councilor At Large for Melrose, MA) and I were on a senior trip (unaffiliated with the High School) to Bermuda.  He approached me one night during the trip when many of us were out at a bar.  I was very visibly intoxicated, almost to the point of being incapacitated. He separated me from the rest of the group, walked me out of the bar, and into a cab.  In the cab, he immediately began to grope and kiss me, to the point that the cab driver asked us not to have sex in the car.  I recall not wanting to do anything sexual with him at all.  At 5’6” and barely 120lbs, I was physically much smaller than him.  My next memory is being back in my hotel room with my roommates, upset and confused with my underwear on sideways and bloodied. He did something that night that I did not want and did not give consent for. I was young, confused, ashamed and filled with self-blame. Outside of my trip roommates, I didn’t tell anyone else what happened for decades, not even my husband.

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In 2016, I was finally in a place where I could begin facing what had happened to me and attempted to initiate a private conversation with my abuser via email; an email which was read but ignored. In 2018, I tried again to initiate a conversation.  This time, he ignored me and blocked my ability to contact him any further.  Thus began my journey for justice and public accountability, not just for me but for all survivors. 

 

What happened affected many aspects of my life, shaped who I became as an adult, and continues to significantly impact me and my family, even to this day.  It has also made me a survivor, not a victim, and shapes the advocacy I am passionate about.

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